Why do humans have sex life
Why do humans have sex life

Why do humans have “sex life”? The reason is often not as simple as you think

I’m sure you’ll agree with one thing:

For our species, sex is not just about reproduction. Many times, most of our sexual behavior occurs in an environment where conception is impossible.

Researchers generally agree that people have sex for one or more of three reasons:

1. Give birth to a child;

2. Experiencing sexual pleasure, and;

3. Strengthen relationships.

However, this is just the general idea of ordinary people, very superficial. If you go deep into the analysis, there are really too many reasons-it turns out that according to research, there are already 237 reasons.

Psychologists Cindy Meston and David Buss of the University of Texas at Austin surveyed 442 people, ages 17 to 52, asking just one question: “List the things you or someone you know who have had sex. All reasons.”

These reasons are often mixed.

These reasons are often mixed

Reasons Men and Women Have Sex Most people agree that men and women are very different emotionally.

There is an old saying that illustrates this point: women have sex with men to be intimate, and men want to be intimate by having sex with girls. At first glance, this makes some sense.

But surprisingly, in the aforementioned survey study, 8 of the top 10 reasons men and women have sex are very similar; Also very similar.

For example, similar reasons for men and women to want sex are often “attracted by the person in front of me”, “want to express love for my partner”, “the other person can arouse my sexual desire”, “this person has a body that excites me” , “I want stimulation” and so on.

In terms of “lustyness”, there is actually not much difference between men and women. Both of them like handsome men and beautiful women, and both of them also have a certain pursuit of sex.

But in addition, there are other reasons that may lead to differences in mutual understanding.

For example, women in a romantic environment may be more willing to have sex, while men can ignite their desire in any place, as long as conditions permit.

So many times, when girls feel that having sex seems to be the next natural step in the relationship, boys may feel that it is too late, too late. Because men may be more likely to be sexually horny — at least when they’re young.

Although, the general reasons for having sex in men tend to be more centered on physical pleasure, whereas among women, sex is more emotionally centered.

However, more women are now having sex for physical pleasure than ever before, and more men are likely to be having sex for emotional reasons—at least that’s how modern society is headed.

It is generally believed that men are more obsessed with sex than women, who see it as a way to deepen their relationship. Now it seems that this statement is not so accurate.

However, under a series of influences and dominance

The top three reasons men and women become sexual are usually not related to their own desire or love, they are based on attraction and pleasure.

Why do girls scream crazily when they see handsome celebrities? It is because of these handsome celebrities that they attract each other. Based on this attraction, girls are more likely to have a life with him. In this case, it is similar to a man who wants to have sex with a beautiful woman when he sees a beautiful woman.

It’s just that sometimes based on social norms and constraints on their own gender behavior, men and women’s sexual performance does not look the same.

In a way, men and women place as much emphasis on sexuality and express love and intimacy as much, almost equally.

However, under a series of influences and dominance, women are naturally more “sexually frigid” than men.


Sexual behavior other than lust The content mentioned above is the reason why people want to have sex.

Whether it is for the pursuit of pleasure, or to have a baby, or to strengthen the relationship between each other, it is inseparable from physical and emotional needs.

But there are still two kinds of needs, that is, psychological and ideological needs. like:

resources (getting a job or money in return) social status (exchanging sex for class-climbing) revenge (getting revenge on a cheating partner) utilitarianism (enjoying better sex) In our everyday lives, these reasons for having sex, It is not a universal demand, but it actually exists in our society.

For example, sex has always been an important “tool” for women. As long as she has a female reason, she can sell her body in exchange for something she wants. This is where women are more sexually unique than men.

Roy Baumeister, a psychology researcher at Florida State University in the United States, has come up with an interesting theory that analyzes sex from an economic perspective.

According to Baumeister, heterosexuality can be understood as a market in which men are buyers and women are sellers. According to this analysis, sex is essentially a female resource.

but it actually exists in our society

Differences in sexual motivation between men and women put men at a disadvantage in sexual negotiations. Scientific evidence shows that men are generally more sexually motivated than women. The people around the world who want sex but can’t get it are almost exclusively men.

Of the couples who reported a gap between ideal and reality, the majority who complained about wanting more sex than they were getting were men.

Usually, men dominate all measures of sexual interest, such as sexual fantasies, pornography consumption and prostitution, hiding at home for “hand exercises”, etc. It does not mean that women have no part, but that men play a “dominant” role.

Men’s higher motivation for sex puts them at a disadvantage because, according to the well-known “principle of least interest,” the person who is less invested (or less motivated) in a relationship controls the relationship.

Like, if you love your partner more than she loves you, and you are more invested in the relationship than she is, then the control of the relationship rests with her.

People in love will do anything to salvage the relationship, even if it means taking big concessions. According to this principle, the fact that women have lower sexual needs and sexual motivations puts them in an advantageous position in sexual negotiations.

Another reason why female sexuality is a valuable resource has to do with the history of human society, in which men, without exception, have controlled most of the social resources-money, status and positions of power. In this context, sex becomes one of the few assets women can use to gain other valuable social goods such as power, status, and money.

Based on this theory, a woman with looks might be likened to a property owner looking to sell. It made sense for her to properly advertise, market, price and position her property to create more demand and ultimately get the best deal.

After all, men’s sex is worthless in the market place, and men seeking to “buy” women’s sexuality need to bring other valuable social resources to the transaction, such as attention, time, love, respect, commitment, money, status, etc. , only in this way can he get the sex of a woman.

This kind of sex is just a transaction, a sex life deviated from true feelings, which can neither enhance each other’s emotions, nor bring continuous happiness to oneself.

When you choose this way to get in touch with sex, you naturally also choose all the consequences of this way.


Men and women view sex differently Men and women are of course different and despite the similarities mentioned above, they have sex for different reasons.

The researchers counted the 10 reasons for the biggest gender differences, such as

1. A person who is scantily dressed. Men mentioned it more often than women.

2. I want to feel manly, more manly.

3. I want to release my sexual desire. more men.

4., I want to feel feminine, more feminine.

5. The person has an ideal body. more men.

6. This person is available. more men.

7. The person’s appearance excites me. more men.

8. This person is very interesting. More women.

9. I want to orgasm. more men.

10, the opportunity came. more men.

All in all, men are more likely to want sex based on a woman’s physical characteristics, such as a desirable body, an attractive face, and the girl in front of me turns me on.

Arguably, men are more likely to be sexually stimulated by visual cues, such as pornographic content.

Women were more likely to engage in sexual behaviors based on their contribution to the relationship, such as “I want to express my love,” “I want deeper emotional intimacy,” and so on. Normally, most women prefer to have sex in a committed relationship.

Therefore, we only need to stick to the “normal” sex life, and those who are abnormal, just know and keep a distance from them.

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